All This And Heaven Too
by thainthood
Summary: Over the summer break between sophomore and junior year, both Quinn and Rachel make startling realisations about themselves. When they get back to school, Santana notices that both girls are acting stranger than usual, and makes it her mission to find out just what happened over the summer. (On indefinite hiatus)
1. Chapter 1: Gay Berry

A/N: Hey guys! I know, I know, I know - I'm a terrible person. I promised a few people that I'd have a new fic up after that last oneshot I posted and that it's been a few months since I said so but... it's here now! That's a plus, right? Better late than never!

Warning: To those few people who don't particularly like Finn - you're going to have to get through a little bit of Finchel to get to the Faberry. Sorry.

* * *

Rachel was happy. Finn was _finally_ shaping up to be the leading man she hoped he would be, putting more effort into Glee club, and even trying to improve his dancing. Rachel wasn't helping him with _that_ though. She refused to. Even _she _couldn't help him with his dance skills.

Rachel just couldn't see him ever becoming a successful dancer, though she'd never tell him that. The combination of his height and the length of his limbs just didn't liken him to the level of dancing that most people were capable of. But nonetheless, she was proud of his efforts.

It was their second week at school. Today they were spending their lunch hour in the auditorium, practicing a song and dance routine to show the other members of Glee club. Rachel hoped it would heighten their spirits and get them ready for Sectionals. After all, it was the final year for some of them – it would be their last chance to qualify, and possibly make it to Nationals.

"_I'm feeling rough, I'm feeling raw, I'm in the prime of my life…"_ Finn sang, clicking his fingers at his side and making his way across the stage. He was frowning at the same time, probably because he was having trouble putting everything together, like he always did.

Rachel tried not to laugh. He really did look like a constipated monkey in that moment. Finn was never good at multitasking, she mused, except when it involved his x-box and food.

"Finn?" Rachel interrupted when he reached the other side of the stage. She pressed pause on the CD player playing the backing track and looked at him.

"Did I do something wrong, Rach? I swear, I'm trying really hard but – "

Rachel smiled at him. "You're doing fine, Finn. I just had a thought, and I think it is necessary for me to voice it. I feel as though you would benefit greatly from it."

"O-okay." Finn looked at her questioningly. "What's up?"

"Maybe it would be easier if you simply walked and sang?" Rachel suggested. "I can see that the inclusion of clicking to the beat has made the routine rather difficult for you, which I don't actually understand, seeing as you are a perfectly competent drummer."

"Yeah, I guess." Rachel knew from Finn's expression that he had no idea what she'd just said.

So she repeated it in simpler terms. "Finn, you don't have to click anymore."

"Oh." He looked a little pleased. "That's great! I was having trouble with that whole clicking thing."

Rachel managed to not roll her eyes at him. "I know you were, Finn. That's why I'm saying you don't have to do it anymore."

Finn just grinned at her. "Thanks, Rach."

"That's okay. Now," Rachel continued, "Shall we take it from the top?"

* * *

They were finished rehearsing, and Finn was walking Rachel to her locker so she could pick up her books for her next class.

"We're close to perfect!" Rachel gushed about their routine.

Finn nodded as they stopped at Rachel's locker and she took out her books. "Does that mean we can show everyone at the next Glee club meeting?"

Rachel gasped and pulled her head out of her locker. "Of course not, Finn! I said that we're _close_ to perfect, not that we _are_ perfect. One must not perform unless they are sure that their act is completely flawless. I, for one, know that our performance still needs some work. And I will not present our song to the Glee club until it is ready. What kind of co-captains would we be if we presented a less-than-perfect performance? The members of Glee club look up to us as role models, Finn, and we must show them our aptitude for perfection."

"Okay, Rachel. Our song can wait." Finn said simply. He knew better than to argue with Rachel Berry about performing.

"Thank you, Finn. I hope you understand my requirement for absolute perfection. How else will I prepare myself for the level of perfection required of me when I reach Broadway? I have no qualms about setting high goals for myself, and everyone knows that the groundwork necessary to reach those goals begins right now."

Finn only understood half of what Rachel had just said, so he just nodded. "But, Rach, you really don't need to try so hard."

"Finn, did you understand what I just said?" Rachel raised an eyebrow. "I said that I need to get everything right _here_ if I want to achieve my dream of being on Broadway. I _have_ to try."

"Yeah, I know what you said." Well, he knew _now_, when she said it in fewer words. "But you still don't need to try so hard."

Rachel's jaw dropped. "Finn! I – "

Finn held up a hand to silence her. "Let me finish."

Rachel closed her mouth and looked at him inquisitively. He'd never told her to stop talking before. She waited.

He just shrugged. "You don't need to try so hard because you're already perfect. And if Broadway doesn't want you, then they're crazy. They don't deserve you. You're better than Broadway."

She stood still for a moment. Then tears gathered in the corners of her eyes, and Rachel stepped forward to wrap her arms around Finn.

"Those are the sweetest words anyone has ever said to me." She breathed into his shirt. "Thank you."

"It's okay, Rach." Finn answered softly, wrapping his arms around her and resting his chin atop her head. "It's true though – you're perfect. I mean, sometimes you talk a lot, and I don't really understand what you're saying, and you get really obsessed with performing and stuff, but you're still perfect. I think singing is like breathing for you. It comes so easily, and whenever I watch you sing, you look alive. Just like you're breathing."

Rachel laughed a little, stepping out of his embrace. "Thank you, Finn. It really does mean a lot."

Finn gave her his wrinkly eyed, crooked smile. "Any time."

Rachel smiled a teary smile and pulled her books out of her locker. "I think you're the best friend anyone could ever have, you know."

"Really? Thanks!" Finn grinned, closing her locker door. He looked to the ground, scrunched up his face a little and then looked back at Rachel. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course." She was a little concerned now. "What's wrong, Finn?"

"I just…" He looked like he was searching for the right words to say. "I wanted to know why you broke up with me over the holidays. I mean, I thought we were going good… but then, out of the blue, you came over to my house and dumped me." He frowned. "I just don't understand."

"Oh." Rachel looked pained.

"Was-was I not enough? 'Cause I can totally do more for you, y'know, if you wanted. I want to be the perfect boyfriend, Rach." Finn turned his pleading, puppy-dog eyes onto her.

"Finn." Rachel almost whined. "I told you – it's not you, it's me. You _were_ the perfect boyfriend, even though you did sometimes forget about our dates and anniversaries and movie nights…" She sighed, hugging her books close to her chest. "It's just me. There's something… I can't be in a relationship with you anymore. There _is_ a reason, I promise you. But I can't tell you right now."

"Okay. I believe you." Finn nodded. "Will you tell me the reason?"

"Not now, Finn."

"Will you tell me _ever_?"

Rachel sighed. "Come over to my house on Friday night, and I promise I'll tell you."

Finn tried to act nonchalant about finally knowing the reason he was unceremoniously dumped over the summer holidays, but his eager eyes gave him away. "Okay, Rach. Are you sure though?"

Rachel just had to smile at him. Even though _she_ broke up with _him_, he was still being sweet, and cared enough to ask whether she was okay with it. "Yes, Finn. I promise to tell you on Friday, okay? I just need some time to figure out what I'm going to say."

Finn nodded. Rachel sighed. Today was Monday. She had four days to figure out how to say why she broke off her relationship with Finn. It wasn't like she didn't know why (because she did); she just didn't know how to tell him. Because telling him would mean having to admit _it_ to herself. And _it_ was something she didn't even want to think about right now.

* * *

Friday came far too quickly for Rachel's liking. All of a sudden, the bell signalling the end of the day was ringing, and Rachel was getting into her car and driving home.

Finn had been poking and prodding her about _it_ and, every time, Rachel would reply with an "I'll tell you on Friday, Finn". For once, she was glad that they didn't share any classes together, because she was already frustrated with his endless questioning. She still had to endure him during Glee though, which was a pain. But she held her head high and told him to wait until Friday. And now it _was_ Friday.

A few hours later, the sky was darkening, and Rachel had only just registered that she was at home. The doorbell rang but she didn't hasten answer it.

As expected, it was Finn.

"I come bearing gifts." He said with a grin, showing her the bag containing a bucket of Rachel's favourite vegan ice cream.

Rachel smiled hesitantly. He was being very kind, and Rachel wanted to tell him to stop, because she couldn't handle all of his niceness. Especially when she was going to be telling him the reason why they were no longer a couple.

Which was a very daunting subject.

Rachel took the bag from him and led him to the kitchen where she put the ice cream in the freezer for later. Then they traipsed up to her bedroom, because Rachel thought Finn should be comfortable (and seated) when she delivered the news.

They both sat down on her bed, side by side. Finn turned a little so they were looking at each other. He looked at her expectantly. He thought it was weird how she hadn't said that much since he arrived, and wanted to proceed with caution.

"So, Finn." Rachel said with false enthusiasm, clapping her hands together once. "I assume you know why you are here tonight?"

"Yeah. You were gonna tell me the reason you broke up with me, I guess."

"Okay. I should get straight to it." She breathed deeply, and then exhaled.

But didn't say any more.

"Rach?" Finn queried.

Rachel seemed to be aware of the fact that she hadn't said anything. Her mouth was open, as if she was about to speak, but still nothing came out.

"Rachel, it's okay." Finn said in a placating tone. "You don't have to tell me. You're not ready, I can tell. It can wait."

All of a sudden, Rachel was in tears, and Finn was holding her to his chest, whispering soothing words into her ear. Rachel shook her head and tried to talk through her tears.

"Finn, I-I-I need to tell you this." She said, hiccoughing slightly and pulling away. The tears had slowed, but they hadn't completely stopped.

Finn eyed her warily. "Only if you want to."

"I want to." Rachel nodded resolutely, pawing at her wet cheeks. "I feel bad knowing that you don't know the real reason I broke up with you."

"Okay. Take your time."

Rachel took another deep breath and looked him in the eyes. She'd stopped crying.

"Finn… I'm gay."

Finn lost consciousness.


	2. Chapter 2: Quinn Fabgay

A/N: Forgive me if updates are few and far between for the next couple of weeks – my exam block has just begun, so my spare time is mostly dedicated to study.

* * *

When he woke, Finn was only dimly aware of the pint-sized brunette sitting next to him. Rachel was humming a song. Finn didn't know what it was, but it sounded nice. Rachel always sounded nice.

Where was he? He wondered.

He groaned and tried to sit up. Rachel pushed him back down softly and rearranged the pillow beneath his head. He realised he was on Rachel's bed. Why was he on Rachel's bed? He was only allowed on her bed when they were making out. Were they making out?

Finn shook his head. They couldn't have been. Rachel had broken up with him over the summer holidays. So why was he in Rachel's bed _with_ Rachel?

He was just about to ask Rachel when he felt the wetness on his chest. His shirt was wet. Huh. Then he remembered.

Rachel was crying. Finn was holding on to her and telling her everything was going to be okay.

His memory came back to him and he couldn't help but gasp. "You're _gay_?"

Rachel gave a hollow laugh. "Yes, Finn. Good to know you're back. You're probably horrified right now – maybe even a little disgusted – and I would allow you to leave, but I don't think that would be a very smart idea, considering you just blacked out. I'm merely concerned about your safety and wellbeing. I don't want to torture you or anything, if that's what you're thinking."

"That's not what I was thinking. I'm not horrified." Finn said quickly, reaching over for Rachel's hand when she wouldn't make eye contact. He gave her hand a gentle squeeze. "And I'm not disgusted."

"Then what are you?" Rachel asked, slipping her hand out of Finn's grip. "Ashamed?"

"No, I'm not ashamed either." Rachel caught his eye and he gave her a tentative smile. "I'm just surprised."

"Surprised? Is that all?" Rachel was sceptical.

"Yep. It's no big deal, I guess." Finn shrugged. It really wasn't a big deal to him. "I have nothing against gay people. It's just a little bit of a surprise when your ex-girlfriend comes out to you. I mean," He chuckled, "You'd be a little surprised if _I _decided to come out to you, right?" He quietened a little. "It… it wasn't _because_ of me, was it?"

Rachel laughed, but then shut up as soon as she saw how hurt Finn looked. "No! Goodness, _no_." She took Finn's hand back. "It wasn't because of you, Finn." She reassured him.

"Good." Finn smiled, gathering the energy to sit up properly. Rachel fussed a little, but let him do so. "If it was because of me, I'd probably be a little less okay with it, but because it's not… I'm cool with it."

"Just like that?" Rachel asked, incredulous.

"Just like that." Finn nodded. "Rachel, _you_ were the one that taught me to accept everyone. I'm not going to make a big deal over the fact that you're gay."

Rachel flushed.

"Oh my God…" Finn said slowly. "You're gay!"

Rachel raised her eyebrows at him. "Yes, Finn, I thought you'd already come to that conclusion. Are you going to black out again?"

"No! I mean… I just… it was sinking in." He said defensively. Then he brightened considerably. "Does this make me your lesbro?"

"Lesbro?" Rachel giggled a little.

"You know… you're the lesbian and I'm the bro! Lesbro!" Finn said excitedly. "I've never had a gay friend before."

"Um, Finn?" Rachel questioned. "Kurt, Santana, Brittany…?"

Finn hummed. "Kurt doesn't count because we're brothers now. Santana doesn't count either, because she's not exactly a friend."

"What about Brittany?"

Finn shrugged. "I'm not as close to her as I am with you. I mean, you were my girlfriend. And she's not _gay_ gay. She's always saying she's bi."

Rachel chose to not question his logic. "Okay, Finn. You're my quote-unquote _lesbro_."

Finn grinned. "Now that you've finally got all that out in the open, you have to give lesbro Finn all the details."

Rachel acted as though she didn't hear him. "Hmm?"

"C'mon, Rach. Don't hold back!" He pushed. "I promise I won't be hurt or anything. Tell me, _please_?"

… And here came puppy-dog eyed Finn. Rachel rolled her eyes.

"What do you want to know, Finn?"

"Everything!"

Rachel raised a brow.

"Okay, okay. How about you start with… how you figured out you were gay?" Finn suggested.

Rachel heaved a sigh. "Well, I'm…"

"Gay." supplied Finn.

"Gay." Rachel confirmed. "Wow, it sounds so strange saying it out loud." She shook her head. "Anyway, I don't know exactly when I _started_ being gay, but I realised that I _was_ gay in the last week of school."

Finn spluttered. "In the last week of school? But you broke up with me halfway through the holidays! Rachel, that was _weeks_ after the end of school!"

"I know, Finn, and I'm sorry." Rachel said apologetically. "I just didn't know how to tell you. It took me that long to work up the courage to break up with you."

Finn waved off her second apology with a smile. "Don't worry about it."

"It was a gradual thing, I suppose. I went from looking at the way _guys_ at school were dressed, to looking at the way _anyone_ was dressed. And then I ended up only looking at the way _girls_ were dressed."

"You were looking at other people while you were still with me?" Finn pouted. "That hurts, Rach."

"Finn, I know that you looked at other girls when you were with me. Don't act so surprised." Rachel said casually. "It didn't mean I liked you any less."

"Oh. I forgive you then, I guess."

"Everything just clicked into place after that. I'd thought my feelings for females were purely platonic and perfectly normal, until I watched a rather enlightening documentary about teenagers and the fluidity of sexuality nowadays." Rachel shrugged. "I realised that, while I was still romantically attracted to you, I wasn't _sexually_ attracted to you. But I _was_ sexually attracted to women."

Hearing Rachel say she was sexually attracted to women made Finn squeak. In his head, he started his mailman chant. His eyes had glazed over and Rachel looked at him curiously.

Then he remembered that he brought ice cream with him to Rachel's house, and not-so-subtly reminded her.

"Of course!" She eyed him mischievously. "I'll race you downstairs."

"No fair, Rachel! I was unconscious before!"

Rachel was out the door before Finn could even get off the bed. Distractions could work wonders, he mused.

* * *

Over the couple of weeks, Rachel found that it was so easy to be friends with Finn, even after their breakup. He didn't seem sad at all (Rachel was a little irked by that fact – did he _not_ feel anything for her while they were dating?), and they were even closer than they were during their relationship. Rachel could talk openly about her feelings for girls, and Finn would listen to her (or at least _try_ to listen to her, which was almost as good).

Everything was out in the open with him, and Rachel felt happy.

The only problems were at school. The student body wasn't aware that Rachel and Finn had broken up over the summer, and they certainly did not know of Rachel's revelations about her sexuality. That suited Rachel just fine. She and Finn weren't _denying_ it per se. They just didn't tell anyone, and no one ever asked. It looked as though they were still a couple though, what with them forming a tight friendship. So Rachel was okay with that.

No, that wasn't the problem.

The problem was Quinn Fabray.

Rachel knew the girl was planning something. She hadn't been attacked or verbally abused by her in a whole month. A whole month!

It wasn't like the bullying had stopped _completely_. Rachel was still being picked on by the rest of the Cheerios. And the rest of the school. It was just Quinn who had stopped.

Admittedly, Rachel remembered Quinn giving her cold looks throughout the first week of school, but after that… nothing. No slurs about her outfits, no snide remarks about _anything_. It was like Quinn had gotten over the taunting, and had moved onto ignoring her.

It bothered Rachel more than it should have. Quinn had spent the better part of the last three years ridiculing her. Why would she stop now?

Rachel figured she must have been planning something big. _Nothing_ she'd endured had ever required so much planning time. Were they going to give her a slushy shower? She pushed the idea away almost immediately. No… it had to be bigger than that. A slushy shower only required the football players and a dozen slushy cups from the cafeteria.

What about a slushy cannon? Maybe the Cheerios were finally going to put their giant, death-defying cannon to use, and shoot her with galleons of blueberry slushy. It would have to be blueberry. Blueberry was the only flavour that didn't completely wash out of her clothes. Every blueberry slushy resulted in a trip to the mall for a new outfit to replace her old one.

Rachel shook her head. An attack via slushy cannon sounded unlikely.

Nonetheless, she made a mental note to avoid the track field until further notice.

Rachel huffed. She was going to get to the bottom of this. Even if it meant having to confront the Head Cheerio.

* * *

It was the first day of school. Quinn was back in her Cheerios uniform after a whole summer without it. She only _just_ remembered how much skin it showed. The skirt was almost non-existent.

She brushed away her issues with the cheerleading uniform. It was her status symbol at McKinley High, and there was no way she was going to let a little thing like the length of her skirt get her all worked up. After all she went through to get to the top of the pyramid? Quinn shook her head. No. It wasn't even a problem. She could deal with it. She opened the door of her car and stepped out.

And then slid straight back in.

Now _that _was someone she didn't need to see as soon as she got to school. Especially when they were the focus of Quinn's thoughts for the entire summer holiday.

Quinn's wicked, _immoral_ thoughts.

Two seconds at school and her heart was racing. Her palms were sweating as she gripped the steering wheel, trying to decide whether it would be so bad to skip the first day.

Quinn sighed. She couldn't skip school. She didn't even know _how _to skip school. She had a perfect attendance record. But the idea of truanting was still in her head. Would the school notice if she drove back out of the student parking lot and went straight home?

Yes, they probably would, she reasoned. Besides, she didn't know what she'd do once she got back to her place – her mother was home.

So, going home was not an option.

What about staying in her car the whole day? Quinn wondered. Then she shook her head. She was _Quinn Fabray_ for God's sake! She was HBIC of McKinley! Why did a little thing like _the bane of her existence_ _standing right across from her car_ make her nervous?

Not _nervous_, Quinn corrected. Frustrated. She was frustrated. And annoyed.

Quinn huffed. She glanced at her rear view mirror and sighed.

They were _still_ there. It had been well over a minute!

She was getting antsy. She needed to get to her locker before the first class of the day, and she was cutting it close. It was now or never. She breathed in deep and grasped her door, swinging it open and stepping out once again. She steeled herself before turning around.

Thankfully, they hadn't noticed her yet. They were still crouched on the ground, picking up sheets of paper. Quinn cursed the person who knocked them out of their hands. At least it kept them busy, so she could try to make it into the school without being seen. Quinn almost smiled, and began walking towards the school.

But, of course, the fates wanted to torture her.

As she was gearing herself to walk straight past her so-called nemesis's car, they lifted their head.

"Hi, Quinn!" Rachel said brightly, looking up at her. "I hope you had a lovely summer holiday?"

Quinn fixed her with what she hoped was a look of cool indifference, and continued on. At least Rachel didn't follow her. When she reached the school, she ducked into the nearest empty classroom and closed the door, leaning her head against it.

Rachel Berry.

God, that girl was going to be the death of her.

* * *

The last class of the day was finally nearing its end, and Quinn sighed. It had been a long day.

A long day of avoiding Rachel.

Quinn cringed internally, remembering the incident in her car this morning. _Why_ did Rachel have to make her so nervous? Why on earth didn't she just get out of her car, throw Rachel an insult, and get on with her day? That was what was _expected_ of her. So, why didn't she do it?

Oh, that's right.

Quinn Fabray had a little bit of a crush on Rachel Berry. And she only realised yesterday.

Her summer holiday was torturous, to say the least. Even though she was at her own house, far away from one Rachel Berry, Quinn's thoughts would always stray to her. And Quinn had no idea why, up until yesterday.

After three years of teasing and taunting, bullying and harassing, Quinn Fabray realised she had a super-duper-giant-mega crush on Rachel Berry – the person she _thought_ was the bane of her existence. Well, Quinn figured, she still kind of _was_ the bane of her existence. She still annoyed Quinn to death – it just wasn't the way she was supposed to.

Quinn was _annoyed_ because Rachel made her jealous of Finn, who was allowed to spend all his time with her. (In fact, that made Quinn _more_ than annoyed. It was _Finn_, for Christ's sake!)

Quinn was _annoyed_ because it was hard to keep a straight face when the diva was laughing.

Quinn was _annoyed_ because it was hard not to smile (or gawk) when Rachel was up on stage, singing her heart out.

Quinn was _annoyed_ because she was having difficulty keeping her hands to herself whenever Rachel chose to come to school wearing one of her skirts, the lengths of which rivalled the Cheerios' uniform.

Oh, who was she kidding? _Rachel_ didn't annoy her – she was annoyed with _herself_ for falling in love with her. Quinn clapped a hand to her mouth to stifle her gasp.

She didn't just have a _crush_ on Rachel. She was _in love_.

She let her newfound revelation settle. So she was in love? That was just _great_. She cursed Rachel under her breath, and then groaned.

They had Glee club after school. It was daunting, knowing that she had to be in the same room as the girl she just realised she was in love with. She was going to be in the same room as Rachel Berry.

Rachel Berry, in all her sinfully short skirt-ed glory.


End file.
